A Beautiful Moment Captured

Okay, let's be real, those of you who've been around long enough to have read my pregnancy posts know that the whole process was anything but a walk in the park for me.
I mean, being pregnant means you have a human being growing inside of you for goodness' sake.
That in itself sounds pretty awful.
BUT it's really a miracle and one of the most amazing things a woman could ever experience.
And this photo captured the beauty of my first ever pregnancy.
I was about 6.5 months at this point and this was in New York, at my 1st baby shower.
(I had another in California when I was further along.)
This is easily one of my most favorite photos of myself ever
and hopefully, God willing, I'll have some more of these preggo photos to treasure in the years to come.

[Joining Jenni for day 17 of her Blog Every Day in May challenge.]

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I once was stubborn, but now I'm grateful . . . and still stubborn from time to time.

[Joining Jenni for day 16 of her Blog Every Day in May challenge.]

This morning I prayed and said to God something along the lines of,

"This, my life right now, is exactly what I wanted it to be 5 years ago. I have a great husband, we have a healthy daughter, and I'm living in beautiful California in a cozy Victorian. Umm, you've really blessed me, God. I cannot complain."

I said that to Him knowing that lately I've sort of forgotten how far He's brought me. 

I mean, just 5 years ago I was struggling with loneliness because being single sucked. 

[I was never good at appreciating the single life. Let's just be honest, it's rough.]

I couldn't see anything promising in the horizon. 

In fact, my horizon was blocked out by a bunch of skyscrapers and polluted city air. 

I definitely was not happy living in New York City. 

I just didn't feel like it was the place for me anymore. 

I had this rising frustration that made me feel just a tad bit anxious about where exactly I would end up in life. 

What exactly God's plans were for me, I had no idea. 
I hated not knowing the specifics; being clueless made me feel helpless.

I kinda felt like He was being a mean Dad and stringing me along, 

making me wait and wait and wait 

as some sort of punishment for expecting too much. 

But in my core I knew all of that nonsense wasn't true. 

I mean, His timing is always perfect 

and I knew there were really cool things in store for me. 

I just wanted them "Now, Daddy!" (Remember that line by Veruca Salt in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? My husband quotes it all the time.)

Patience was a virtue I did not desire. 

And now, I have everything I wanted. 

But as I said before, I often forget how far i've come, 

and from time to time I become just like miss Veruca Salt all over again. 

I complain (and I've done this publicly on this here blog) about how hard my life is 

and how being a mom is the huuugest challenge ever, 

and how marriage is nothing like happily ever after, 

and how my daughter is driving me to the point of insanity

and so on. 

I mean most of that stuff is fundamentally true BUT what the heck?
I have everything I hoped for!

If I were God I would smack me for being ungrateful. 

Thank goodness I'm not Him and He is beyond patient and loving with me.

My lot in life is exactly what it should be 

and, as I said yesterday, I truly cannot complain. 

"Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; You make my lot secure.

The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places..." 

- Psalm 16:5-6

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A Day in the Life of Me.

If you were me right now you'd be sitting on your couch, still in your PJ's and Pepto Bismol pink robe, trying to think of an incredibly clever way to share what one day in your life looks like. 

You'd draw a complete blank as you stare at your screen. 

Then, too many minutes later, in a heated act of total frustration you'd throw your hands in the air and yell at the top of your lungs, "I give up!"

[Total exaggeration, my friends.]

My current dream is to wake up in the morning, throw on some sweats and a t-shirt, grab my laptop and leave my sleeping husband and baby behind while I sneak off to the library for some alone time, Starbucks in hand. 

But those types of escapades don't fit into our current schedule.

So I must deal.

Honestly, my day-to-day life would bore the living daylights out of most of you.

I mean, c'mon, i'm a stay-at-home-mom. 

The pinnacle of my daily excitement usually involves a makeupless trip to Walgreens or something of that nature. 

You are not missing out by not being me, lemme tell you. 

However, I do get to spend each day with my beautiful baby girl. 

And that truly is one of my deepest desires come true. 

In essence, most of what I do is clean, care for my daughter, and blog while she naps. 

It sounds ever so simple, but don't you be fooled. 

The dishes have a way of piling mountain-high whenever my back is turned 

and my daughter has a habit of pulling down my pants while i'm trying to wash them (her attempt at getting me to stop what i'm doing and hold her.)

There is always, and I do mean always, a mess to clean or a diaper to change or a belly to feed. 

And blogging is a challenge—an enjoyable challenge, but a challenge nonetheless.

I do all of these things because I'm passionate about each one. 

I enjoy cleaning (I just wish I had an extra set of arms and legs to get things done quicker!) and I love expressing my thoughts through writing and I definitely enjoy being a wife and raising my child. 

Moral of this post, 

I cannot complain. Yes my daily routine is pretty repetitive, but it sure is good!

[Joining Jenni!]

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My Happy Things.

This is the stuff I thrive on, the stuff that really keeps me going. 

If it weren't for this stuff, life would be pretty BLAH. 

{one} 

Waking up in the morning to find myself nestled under the coziest, cloudiest, cotton-balliest down comforter. It was one of our most brilliant decisions to put this loveliness on our bridal shower registry. 

{two} 

My morning cup of coffee.

Up until a few months ago I wasn't a coffee person, then something in me just clicked (probably the dire need for a zap of energy first thing in the AM) and now it's something I look forward to enjoying each day. 

{three}  

Breakfast in bed. My husband spent an hour and a half prepping my Mother's Day breakfast on Saturday while I slept in. 'Twas heavenly to wake up to the aroma of a dish I had requested (huevos rancheros) and consume it while in the comfort of our bed. {sigh}

{four}

Sunshine. The way it filters through our windows and fills our rooms with a soft, warm, cozy glow... it just relaxes me. I notice it most early in the morning, as it rises, and late it in the evening, as it sets. [thank You, God, for sunshine.]

{five}

Nail Polish. It's one of those girly things that makes me feel an immediate boost, especially if I choose a bright and perky color (which I almost always do, no matter the season.) Bright pinks and corals are my favorite. No matter how hard I try I just can't pull myself away from 'em!

{six}

The smiles of my loved ones. Talk about an immediate boost! When they smile, I smile, and it's a beautiful beautiful chain reaction. 

{seven}

Photography. I fit pretty nicely into the amateur category, but every once in a while I'll get a great shot and feel super proud of myself for capturing a sweet/cute/funny moment that I can visually treasure forever.

{eight}

Thrifting. {swoon!} It comforts my stay-at-home-mommy heart to know I can purchase awesome things without having to spend and arm and a leg. Also, there's something so enjoyable about sifting through items to find that one thing that fits perfectly in your home. Ya either love it or hate it, and I love it.

{nine}

Oldies. Musicals, black and white films, vintage books, songs once popular a bagillion years ago– these make my heart truly happy. 

{ten}

Morning quiet time with God. There's no other happy thing like it. Reading the Bible, praying and journaling are 3 things I need on a daily basis. Without quiet time I can't function properly. It's the time I use to refocus on who God is and turn my affection toward Him. It's amazing how those moments can just propel me into my day in a much more effective and beautiful way.

What are some things that make you happy?

Do share!

[Joining Jenni!]

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Dear Husband: Forgive me? [a poem]

Yesterday was all about me (and the rest of you lovely mommies!) as it was Mother's Day, and our special day to soak in the plethora of praises poured out unto us well-deserving, hard working, ever-sacrificing mothers. 

But today is all about my beloved. 
At least here on my blog it is! =)

I'm joining in with Jenni and offering a public apology in the form of a poem.
I gots crazy poetic skillz dat none of y'all ain't even heard!
And it goes a lil' suttin like dis:

For all the times i've pms'd 

and the times i've caused you stress.

For all the dishes left unwashed, 

and all your favorite socks left dirty & tossed.

For the monster I become when I don't get enough sleep, 

For my emotionally disturbed days that make you wanna weep.

For making the weakest coffee ever 

and publicly sharing stories of you that you don't deem very clever.

For repeatedly causing you to be late.

For singing loud and annoying songs I know you hate.

For last-minute packing and nagging remarks

For making you roll over when you snore in the dark—

For all of this and so much more, I'M SORRY.

I often forget how blessed I am

to have you for a husband.

While I was waiting for Mr. Right

I spent many MANY a night

praying and crying that you would come

and asking God "How long? Why not now? How come??"

Then He answered and I met you.

And now we live together, under the very same roof!

There's no way I could overlook your love.

I see it in your eyes when you stare at me.

I watch it from afar as you play with B.

I sense it when we cuddle while we watch movies.

I know it in my core, because the love you feel for me

is from God.

It can't be replaced; there's only one of its kind.

And it's yours and it's totally mine.

So with all that said

Will you forgive me?

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